Money, money, money!
Wow, this has been a banner week for "send me your info so I can send you money" emails. What first caught my eye was that they're getting more generous. Used to be that they'd only be dangling a million bucks (or euros) but I got one recently that upped the ante. First off, it was from a real professional! Professor Benjamin Edmund. He wanted to send me $10.5 million. What a deal! But then I was totally bummed when I googled the name and found he'd offered $15 million to somebody else already. Maybe his fortune took a hit in the mortgage crisis?
The second notable came just today. What struck me was that it was something different – and that's rare! Here's the text:
My name is Engr. Glenn Wood, a geologist working with an Oil Company. Due to my busy schedule at the rig, i hardly come to mainland to manage some proceed made from crude oil deals. Presently, banks/security vaults have been instructed to report all unserviceable accounts with funds for confiscation in preparation for the 2012 olympics. It is painful when one amasses so much but has virtually no time for 're-investment'. I need a partner to invest and manage the funds in my absence. We shall conclude on your duties and benefits in subsequent communication.
Glenn Wood.
See? Not a widow or a lottery but a geologist! And he works for an "Oil Company"! Good choice Glenn! Very, very logical too. It certainly makes sense that the banks/security vaults are reporting funds for confiscation to get ready for the 2012 Olympics. Gotta have dough on hand to build all the facilities, right? And for sure you can't manage your "proceed" when you're away on a rig. No communications out there in the middle of the ocean. Besides, who has time when you're helping your pals pump up the crude? And of course it's the geologists who work the deals, not Exxon or BP. Common knowledge.
Okay, those are my gems. Anyone have something even more outrageous?
- And that's today's word from the bird
So, this one time I tried to share an interesting anecdote and broke the internet….
Since you asked:
I got an email from the "FBI"(!) last week telling me that they were
A) looking out for my internet security
B) preventing fraud
and C) they were holding a check for me in the sum of 28 million (and change) Euros.
Which they had because it had been "wrongly and incorrectly attempted to deliver to Evil Doer"–apparently the "FBI" had intercepted the check in some "routine checkings and verifyings that discovered your property was attempting to be misused."
All that I needed to do was to supply all my information and a check for the "Minimum Release Application Fee" of only $139.
But they didn't want the check until after they were sure I am really me so the address to mail the check to would be sent to me "after all positive verification and releasing procedures and policys are Officially Attended to"
As everyone with an email address does, I've gotten uncounted emails from strangers wanting to give me money but this one from the "FBI" is a new one to me. And it did not explain where all this money supposedly came from–to be fair though, I guess I should know where I'm getting 28 million Euros!
Another difference in this one was the lack of any assurances that they(or I) were honorable or that this was legal and legit because they already had the paper work I would need to defraud their government and or bank!
Thanks for all the laughs!
Rob Biemer